A WIDOW mourning the loss of her husband says ‘being made to feel like family’ at the care home which looked after him before his death is helping with her grief.
Romayne Instone regularly visit the Royal Star and Garter Home in Solihull – where husband Paul spent two years before his death in 2022 – as part of its Lunch Club service.
Speaking as part of National Grief Awareness Week, which runs from December 2 to 8, she says being with familiar and friendly faces helps her cope with her loss after 58 years of marriage.
Paul served in the RAF, and moved to Royal Star and Garter, which cares for veterans and their families living with disability or dementia, in 2020.
Romayne said: “I used to come with our beloved black labrador Bella to visit Paul regularly, and when he died I really missed my visits to the home.
“I missed the friendships I’d developed with residents and staff, I’d miss the familiar faces. Royal Star and Garter felt like family, it’s as simple as that.”
Romayne was encouraged by staff to stay in touch, and would return with Bella to say hello to her friends, and to visit a relative who had also become a resident.
She was encouraged to join Lunch Club, following its launch in 2023, and has since been made a Lunch Club Host.
Romayne said: “The food is really good, and I like meeting people and spending time with them. I’m a sociable person and I’m happy talking to anyone.
“So when someone new joins I make sure to chat to them, make them feel comfortable and make them realise there is nothing to worry about.
“Lunch Club has helped me grieve – I don’t know how long grief goes on for, but I’ve found coming back to the home, and being with people who knew and loved Paul, helps me greatly. I always look forward to it.”#
Royal Star and Garter is helping support grieving relatives through its newly developed bereavement programme, which was developed with the support of a significant grant from the Armed Forces Covenant Fund Trust.
Each Home has a Heavenly Postbox, where relatives can write letters to their loved ones on seeded note paper, which is later planted in its gardens.
They work with healthcare professionals and external organisations to help signpost relatives to effective support and offer a selection of books to those affected by loss.
Zoe Casey, deputy home manager at Solihull’s Royal Star and Garter, said: “Romayne’s caring and outgoing nature means she instantly connects with other Lunch Club users, which makes her the perfect Lunch Club Host.”
